Don't worry about me

To all my friends and colleagues who may be wondering how I am doing in retirement. Well, don't cry for me Argentina, I am currently out of the country staying at the fabulous Central Boutique Hotel that includes a wonderful shuttle service to any where you wish to visit and a 24-7 supermarket next door for all my culinary needs. Can life be any better?
                    

A word to the wise.

I made a mistake today and entered a womens bathroom. Sorry ladies but if you want us guys to stop using the womens bathrooms then don't make the sinks look like urinals.

Feeling a little older today.

I lost my phone today. I thought I left it in the car but when I went to check the car I could not find it. As I was searching the car a young lady passed by, probably about 30 years old, and asked me if I was looking for my car keys as they were right there hanging in the car door. She obviously realized I was looking for something. I thanked her and assured her that I was not suffering from memory loss but rather looking for my phone which I had misplaced. Do I look that old that strangers feel the need to assist me? Maybe walk me across the street? Help me up from a chair? Not a great Moe's moment.
By the way I found the phone in my pocket. I wonder how it got there?

Over not under

It’s an age-old question (and probably the cause of more than one marital argument): Which way should toilet paper rolls be oriented? Over or Under? This is serious business, wrong installation and the entire roll can unravel all over the floor. As usual I tackle important life issues!
Were you aware that the average person spends 30 minutes per year just looking for the end of a toilet paper roll, translating into hundreds of million of dollars per year in lost productivity.
But now the professionals, the engineers, have finally spoken. The roll is to be over for a quick pull and tear. Don't be embarrassed the next time your guests use your bathrooms, install the toilet paper correctly, they will be very appreciative.

 

Retirement

One should give careful consideration before retiring. Have you ever wondered what happens to  cartoon characters when they accomplished all their goals and decide to retire? What about the coyote and roadrunner? They were a favorite growing up. The coyote never quite able to catch the roadrunner. Take a look at this video you won't believe how the story ended. If anyone is thinking about retirement it is a must see.

Vending machines

I was at a mall recently and as usual I had to use the restrooms. I found the restrooms but discovered something very strange. Right next to the entrance to the restrooms was a vending machine for drinks. The last thing I am looking for is to purchase a coke when I am looking for a place to pee nor for a drink immediately after I pee. I wonder whose brilliant idea this was.