Like a frightened turtle.

Here we go again, another frightened turtle. Do you remember the Seinfeld episode when George was changing after a swim and Jerry's girlfriend accidentally walked in on him. It was the frightened turtle line.  Well, a wildlife smuggler was just caught after Federal agents spotted a turtle peaking out of his trousers. They say that they first spotted" irregularly shaped bulges in his pants". 

 What I really want to know is, how are Federal agents trained on spotting "irregularly shaped bulges in one's pants"? Is this a job that requires experience? Does one need to spend time on a beach observing and learning? Are these federal agents considered specialists in pant bulges? So many questions so few answers.  

 

 

Change the world.

We all want to change the world for the better. Donating to charities is a simple way we can help. Because there are so many important charities in the world, as well as fraudulent ones, one needs to be very selective as to which charity he/she donates to. Do your homework and make a difference. Or, join my cause. Together we can make this world a better place for the Turkey!

Manspreading

Have you heard about this? Manspreading! Men in New York are actually receiving fines for Manspreading on the subways. Either close your legs and let another sit or you will get a ticket.

Are men selfish or do we need a little extra room because the seats are just too small? I am sure there are people who will argue that men have become less considerate over the years, but look at this flyer from 1918 Chicago. It seems men have either been inconsiderate forever or we just need a little extra room for the family jewels.
 

Whatever the reason New York is forcing men to be uncomfortable on the subways. Squish the jewels or pay up.

Slippery Slope?

There has been an argument for decades about whether to allow the sale of beer and wine in places other than the LCBO(liquor control board Ontario) stores and designated beer stores. One argument contends that we need tight controls of all alcohol sales while the other side argues that in other provinces it is already being sold in regular retail locations and Ontario therefore should be no different. As we are aware Ontario has recently decided to allow sales of  beer and wine in certain retail stores. Is it a slippery slope? Are there legitimate concerns? Take a look at a store I passed the other day in another country. I am glad to see the children can get their lollipops and Johnny Walker together. At least it appears the marijuana is still kept behind the counter.

Tumbleweed

Did you see the latest invasion in Australia. Not snow or mosquitos or aliens but Tumbleweed. They call it Hairy Panic. If you hate shoveling snow or fear mosquitos take a look at what these people are facing. Can you imagine the allergies? You have to see this!

 

 

 

 

Happy Valentines Day

I was at a friend's home the other day and in honour of Valentine's day they showed me a kiwi they purchased.

 Then they showed me the other one they purchased.

 Happy Valentines every one!

Death,Taxes and Prunes

We all know that we can't beat death and taxes forever but we certainly can try to avoid them for as long as possible. A good tax planner will help you delay paying taxes but how does one delay aging for as long as possible? I just found the answer, PRUNES. According to a recent commercial from Sunsweet as one gets older, "feeling good starts with Prunes". In middle age there are still many things that can make you feel good but as we get older I guess it is all up to the Prune. So enjoy life as much as possible because one day feeling good only starts with prunes.